Made some more revisions after Loston’s input-thanks loston!
TITLE- When you lose sight of what’s right.
Panel 1– Night time in a dingy, graffitti covered area in the city. Beside a phonebooth with broken glass panels, two shady guys are exchanging a small parcel under a dim street light.
CAPTION- WHEN YOU START WONDERING WHY YOU DO THIS EVERY DAY..
Panel 2– Closer look at the two guys. One is dark, disheveled, unshaven, eyes nervously darting here and there. Lean and fit but his arms have needle marks peppered on them, longish hair flopping about his face. The other guy is an obvious dealer, diamond earrings, tattoo, handing over the package to the junkie.
DEALER- YOU KNOW THE DEAL… YOU’LL GET YOUR FIX ONCE YOU DELIVER THE GOODS..
JUNKIE- YEAH.. YEAH…
Panel 3– The Junkie is now holding the package, the dealer is talking as if issuing instructions, hands gesticulating, heavily ringed fingers. You can now see a gun at the dealer’s waist.
DEALER- NEXT DELIVERY’S THE HIGH SCHOOL..
JUNKIE- YEAH.. YEAH.. LINCOLN MEMORIAL HIGH..
Panel 4– Dealer is just taking a phonecall, Junkie is glancing up at him (you should see some subtle changes in his appearance, less the nervous junkie, more authoritative), dealer hasn’t noticed, he’s turned slightly away.
DEALER- JUST GOT TO DEAL WITH THIS SKANK FIRST…
Panel 5– The dealer has turned around to face a gun barrel in his direction. The junkie is now calm, cool and steady as a rock..
JUNKIE- DEAL THIS…..
Panel 1– All hell has broken loose. Cops everywhere, the dealer on the ground, handcuffed, sirens blaring, lights flashing. We see the junkie talking to a large set detective, the package in his hand, now in a plastic evidence bag.
DETECTIVE #1- HE ALMOST CAUGHT YA OUT THIS TIME…
JUNKIE- ALMOST… BUT NOT QUITE..
Panel 2– the Junkie is in a gym locker/shower thing, around him are cops in various clothes, some changing into uniforms, some into street clothes. The Junkie is wiping the needle marks off with a wet wipe. He looks disillusioned, tired.
CAPTION- WHEN YOU START TO WONDER ‘IS IT WORTH IT?’
Panel 3 (large)- Split into three smaller panels. Same scene to Panel 5 (pg1) but different dealers each time.
CAPTION- WHEN THEY ALL START TO LOOK THE SAME….
Panel 1– the Junkie/cop is now writing report on a computer, his desk has got files piled up on one side, around him other cops at similar work.
CAPTION- AND YOU WONDER WHETHER YOU ARE REALLY DOING ANYTHING TO STOP THIS CRAP…
Panel 2– The junkie/cop interrogating dealer (from Page 1) in an interrogation room, plain table/chairs, glass on one side. Dealer looks unrepentant, uncaring. Junkie/cop looks angry and waving hands about. Next to the dealer is a lawyer, skanky type.
CAPTION- JUST WHEN YOU THINK IT’S A LOSING BATTLE…
Panel 3 (small)– The junkie/cop is opening a front door with his key, he looks really wound up, tired, stressed.
CAPTION- YOU COME HOME…
Panel 1 (Splash page)- Perhaps a birdseye view. The junkie/cop is now wreathed in smiles, arms open, although his eyes look tired/stressed. He’s been enthusiastically greeted by wife (plump, short hair, brunette, asian) holding a young baby (6mths old, boy, chubby) and two kids (boys, around 3-4 year old and 8 year old), the joy on their faces to see him (kids should resemble junkie/cop in some ways). Nice living room/dining room (food on the dining table).
CAPTION- THEN YOU REMEMBER WHO THE BATTLE IS FOR…